Datebook: Sunday, August 13th

A Skating Mom’s Haiku:

I need to confess
I have been admonished
By my small daughter

It seems she doesn’t “want the entire skating world” to “think I am a Charlie White stalker!” And I have to “write about something else!” And I am to say that she is “really a 12-year old red-headed boy who skates pre-juvenile and is interested in the complexities of tree bark.”

I said okay, but that really makes the whole living with another girl thing a bit more complex.

Anyway, it seems to me that I am probably not the only skating mom who listens to music throughout the year imagining the free dance possibilities for the following year. Sometimes it is just a snippet of the scanning radio, or the piped tunes in a department store dressing room. I have grabbed pieces of an envelope or crumpled receipts from my purse and written obscure notes of fragments of the song lyrics because it is rare to ever hear the title or the artist. Several times I have called the radio station and given them the time and date to try to identify the song but that rarely works. I am often left trying to sing partial lyrics to friends. This is not pretty. I was removed from the voluntary 5th grade chorus and asked to turn the piano songbook pages instead.

And regardless of the lengths and depths I have battled in the quest for the holy grail of songs, I have never actually had any of my selections used.

And I think if the coaches and choreographers would have just given it a little time and let me present it in powerpoint we might have had a few GREAT free dance numbers—at least they would be memorable.

When the kids were younger, I was really sold on “Raspberry Beret” by Prince. I mean, the sequined beret alone would have been spectacular. There might have been a few places where the lyrics would have to be dubbed out but that really isn’t a problem in this technologically advanced era.

My all time favorite however, was Billy Ocean’s “Caribbean Queen”. The music builds, there is a fabulous horn section, there is plenty of interaction for the skaters, and the costumes—can’t you just see the costumes!

Vetoed.

Just like my selections by Milli Vanilli. I am quite sure no one has ever skated to the original grammy-winning song. Who cares who really sang those tunes, they were incredible. Michael Buble will probably do an album of their hits and then everyone will be on the bandwagon. Someone just has to be willing to make that first leap of faith.

Since you have not heard Joe Cocker or Steve Miller wafting across the ice rink, you know how those were received also.

No way.

“Not the right sound.”

“Not the right direction we are looking for this year.”

Oh.

I see.

I didn’t know we were going into the freedom-fighter, action figure, Egyptian fairy-winged, crop dusting, secret agent, nomadic pirate outlaw theme this year.

No problem.

I think they have sequins in those colors.

Mombo #9