Datebook: Saturday, October 7th ~ 2006

My husband doesn’t quite understand my shopping methods.

Today I returned a pair of shoes and bought three pair during the exchange.

It is actually very logical. I bought the first pair during a major coupon sale when all the seats were taken and it was so chaotic I think I saw children running with scissors.

Anyway, it is impossible to really be sure about a pair of shoes when you have to battle for a pole position for the little knee to toe fun-house mirror tucked away in the corner.

So I had to bring the shoes home, try them on with my own real stockings instead of those little bank robbery numbers they offer as “complimentary footies”.

In the privacy of my own home, making sure to stay on the carpeted area, I immediately ascertained that the black Anne Klein demi-boots made my lower extremities look like I had cankles-- and swollen cankles at that.

So back I go. This time, in the comfort of a non-coupon day, just regular 15 percent off Tuesdays, I discovered a very attractive Nordic Clog by Clarks. While it might seem true that there would be limited wearing ensembles I immediately envisioned how attractive they would be with any denim item. True, these were not on sale. There are certain items that are excluded from the sale and the list can be obtained from the customer service office.

I also noticed the new “sport” shoes. I do own a pair of sneakers and they are actually several years old. Some might say there is little chance I would ever wear them out, but I prefer to think of it as maintaining my equipment. So, yes, I do own your basic lace-up Nikes, or New Balance, or whatever the brand. But, they are white. Very white.

The new sports shoes have little Velcro straps and look a bit like ballerina slippers, which puts them into a new category of multi-purpose shoe. Easy Spirit has a new line with “gel” insoles and I must say, I can understand those inane commercials after trying it on. I decided to wear the black and silver ones home.

Well, I am a professional woman. It isn’t all fun and games. Sometimes you must restock. In the spring I had attended an ice show where my daughter and her partner were invited to skate. The club was selling tickets for the bleachers or “on the ice” seats. I, wanting to be supportive, bought “on the ice” seats.

The show lasted three hours. After about six and a half minutes I realized the bottoms of my chocolate Ferragamo’s were literary frozen to the mat on the ice. During intermission I went to the pro shop and bought hockey socks and put them OVER my shoes. No help. During curtain calls my daughter took a gander at my footwear and pretended she didn’t know me. The bottom line, no shoe leather should be that thin, even if it is fashionable. There must be some good deals at Goodwill if you don’t mind cold feet.

So, the point is, I waited six months to replace the brown shoes. Since I had to regroup my closet, it makes more sense to restock all at once.

My husband came in from the garage where he performs trash transformations—seriously he seems to do some origami creations with cardboard for the recyclers and asked, “I thought you were taking those shoes back?”

It is not really a question, since he has just made something like swans out of the three shoeboxes.

“I did,” I offered, “but I decided to take your advice and consolidate trips to the store.”

“So you bought three pair of shoes on my advice?”

“Exactly. I probably saved four or five dollars buying all the shoes I needed today instead of going back two more times later.”

Of course he is so humbled by my admission he is speechless and I, well I am just ‘gellin’ in my new ballerina/sport shoes…that also come in brown and beige.

Mombo #9